I Pledged Abstinence but am I the only one?

Feb_00_WaitingForSex_bokeh-burger

I recently wrote an article for Converge Magazine. It was featured on their website this week. It deals with all of the stuff we’re talking about on the blog this month.

Here’s an excerpt from the article…

It’s pretty normal these days for Christian guys to have sex before they’re married. You’ll be hard pressed finding a guy who is still a virgin,” my brother says.

Somewhere along the way we had started talking about guys who sleep around. As if it’s normal talking about sex with your 22-year-old brother.

I grew up going to church. Actually, my Dad was a pastor, so I pretty much grew up “in the church.” So I heard the “save sex for marriage” talk at least once a year, usually during Valentine’s week. I even signed my abstinence pledge card in Grade 8, the one where you commit to wait until you’re married to have sex.

Being temped to be promiscuous was never an issue for me in high school, probably because I kept most boys at a distance, and probably because my self-esteem was at an all time low during those years. Plus, Grade 8 pledges are serious business.

It was during college when the idea of saving sex for marriage became something more than a pledge. Since I had friends who were sleeping around and who weren’t afraid to talk about it openly, I got the chance to ask lots of questions. It was during this time when I solidified my view that sex isn’t about only the physical.

But am I in the minority? Is it pretty normal for Christian guys (and girls) to be sexually active before marriage? And has waiting become so overrated that we just aren’t willing to do it anymore…

Read the rest here (I’m Waiting To Have Sex: Am I The Only One?).

I would love to know your thoughts!

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One thought on “I Pledged Abstinence but am I the only one?

  1. Yeah, sadly, we are definitely in the minority.

    Sometimes there are days and weeks.. and longer that I too feel like the only one. I am a 29 year old single girl who is also a virgin. I’m happy to talk about it with people, and happy to be open about the choices I have made… and often, I find it to be a great talking point.

    “No, it’s not accidental.”
    “Yes, I’ve had the opportunity.”

    The truth is, I have watched so many people’s lives hurt, mangled, scarred, changed, and calloused instead of the binding, healing, loving, caring, and encouraging thing that God intends for it to be.

    Love this series and stumbling upon this blog!
    ~K

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